


I Will Pay

by Marta_Ayanami



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Sengoku Basara, Tangled (2010), Tangled: The Series (Cartoon)
Genre: AU because that's how I roll, Alternate Realities, F/F, F/M, Gen, I mean I have slightly diff ideas but thanks to, M/M, Or not, This.Is.An.AU., because this time I have everything mapped out and so I may not share, crossover AU, in case of Varian and the Moon: credit to snowprincess-artist @ tumblr, just after episodes I've just seen aka "Queen for a Day", not telling how many, seeing hers, some tags maybe a lie, till it's time, yes more of those realities
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-13 14:02:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12985599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marta_Ayanami/pseuds/Marta_Ayanami
Summary: Varian knows this must be a devil, and he's in awe. Because Satan can clearly free his father, because devils are powerful, he knows that, he's read the ancient books. Yes, a chance!!!____Mitsunari gives the creauture no thought. He makes his wish, and goes back to the day it rained.___________Madoka Kaname, as the new Law of the Universe, shouldn't feel so nervous. A name, cried out with a perfect clarity of despair, in her mind, and now she knew whom was he concerned for.Varian.She knew to be concerned for him, even if people haven't yet realised: the Universe told her, as it cringed at the potential of his little experiments.However, Madoka was more than the Universe and what concerned her was the boy's Soul, strong enough to be dangerous, but...The Universe would prefer destroying Varian. Madoka disagreed, and She was its law._____Was this, Mother Gothel wondered, truly the same boy? Something stank. Like these new substances. Alchemy? He had been, he would always stutter out, a 'physicist'!! What was wrong with her Moon boy? He even no longer seemed to be housebroken._____Reboot of my "Puella Magi Mitsunari Magica".





	1. If It's the Last Thing I Do (part 1)

_Swallowed their Pride_

-***-

His voice spent, and everything else inside him, it seemed, hollowed out, like empty vials after succesful (or not) experiments, his whole body shaking with suppressed sobs, the boy, no, the failure of alchemist and failure of a son, somehow found himself kneeling on the floor in front of his father, like often, only this time, it wasn't in his imagination. This time, it was real, and his father wouldn't, unlike in his imagination, pat him and tell him to stand up, tell him  _you did good, son, what's with the kneeling now, stand tall, stand proud_ because his father was, because of  ~~him~~ Rapunzel's betrayal and  ~~Varian's disobedience, Varian's failed experiment's, Varian's failure at even the only thing he's ever been, at being a true alchemist~~ and her broken promise, encased in the rock, now amber, not silver, and just as impossible to destroy and he was  ~~~~maybe even not certainly ~~dead alive~~ conscious.

The sudden voice coming from a window wasn't familiar, but nevertheless, was a hallucination caused by the toxins, certainly, what else would it be?

"No matter what becomes of you? Surely that's just a figure of speech, young boy?"

Still, his hallucination dared to say he didn't.... didn't mean it!!

He turned to face it quickly, praying this figment of his mind wouldn't disappear before he could use some of the worst concoctions on it, or, no, just strangle it with his own hands.

"Figure of speech?!"

No, that wasn't a good retort, but right now, his mind was empty. He came closer and poked the figment. It was warm, and everything inside Varian felt pretty cold right now. In other words, the only logical scientific explanation was this... the figment wasn't a figment, but a real creature.

"I'm sorry," Varian mumbled, not waiting for the not-figment's answer. "I thought you weren't real, but you are real, more than me in any case, so... nevermind and go away."

The non-figment, who wasn't quite a cat and neither was he a squirrel, hmmm, perhaps a hybrid, it was unfortunate that his he had to spend probably all of the next eternity finding a way to free his father, or he'd ask the non-figment whether he had reproductive abilities or not... was grinning all the time.  ~~Like a treacherous princess whose parents were apparently in danger so of course he had to choose her own father over some other father, that's what Varian would do as well, right now, but still, she was a liar, because she had said she wouldn't do that, whereas Varian never said---~~

"Oh? And here I thought I found a perfect magical boy to sign a contract with."

For the second, many old books he's read before reading true alchemy books came to the forefront of the failing son's mind, and he dared to  _hope._

"A contract on an old stinking papyrus, later to be burned in the flames of hell, signed with a blood from one of my arteries?" he asked, trying not to let the hope shine in his eyes. Legends were legends, this couldn't possibly be true.

"No, howe--"

He turned away from the unhelpful quirreldogcat, no longer able to stop the tears of frustration flowing from his eyes. Another betrayal, but this time, he's only bertayed himself with stupid, childish hopes. As if had something as magical as 'soul' to give to some stupid 'devil' in exchange for his father's health, freedom, happines, and maybe a better son as a bonus, that would be nice, oh, and rocks leaving Old Corona, ah, and mom coming back to life, maybe, as a 'sorry' to Daddy, and so... So what? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Devils unfortunately never existed.

The squirrelcat cocked his head. "Aaah, yes. Hmm, yes, we can do the traditional route."

"Traditional--? What?"

Yes, he knew what the not-devil meant, but... what?

"Naturally, you will sign the contract to give your soul and become a Magical Boy in exchange for whatever wish - any wish - you might have, with your blood. Not from the heart, necessarily, that's overly dramatic."

He still didn't dare to believe, but.. the look of the not-cat and that grin never wavered and, despite himself, the young alchemist (future magical boy... will he have to use magic, some part of him wondered... well, that was probably what selling one's soul meant. Magic, how gross. But, for Dad, anything.) believed. Believed now. Ran up to the window, caught the non-figment in his arms, and kissed it on the cheek.

"That you, Mister Devil, oh thank you, thank you, thank you!!! Just wait here, I have my last papyrus sheet in the other room, so wait here!!"

And with that, Varian, son of Quirin, dropped the dear Devil on the carpet and, without any other thought, ran off to write the contract.

___

Kyuubey looked at the boy's back, slightly bewildered. With blood, hmm. No magical girl or boy insisted on that in the last four hundred years, but he could see that without the mythical physical contract with blood signature (ah, humans, what insane beings) the boy would never make a wish, because he'd never believe. Naturally, he had a feeling that Varian would love the true explanation (entropy, cosmos, etc) while in a better state, but right now, only the future Magical Boy's wounded soul was responsive, not his mind, which the boy now blamed, deep down, for everything.

 

___________

 

It's been three months since Varian made his wish. Once, he snuck out of the Tower without Mommy's permission and knowledge, two months three weeks and one day ago, to check on the now-King, to see that he's indeed alive and not frozen in not-amber.

After that successfool mission, he went back of course, not wanting to break Mom's heart, or, more likely, Mom's youth. Now, it would soon be his birthday, the time when Mom would always bring him knew Alchemy books, according to his diary. He couldn't wait. It will be awesome!!!

 The wish, just as he's expected, worked completely differently that he's imagined, just like it should be, in case of any proper deal with a devil. Still, he was alive, which was slightly unexpected - apparently, one of his old childish theories, that of 'soul' meaning 'life', was false. And as for his wish - eh, he said what he meant and meant it. He couldn't do it on his own. He failed. And now, he gave up on doing this on his own and Kyubey helped him. The result was slightly unexpected, true enough, but still amazing, because his father was alive, healthy, and, surprisingly, a king. His wish had been simple, really, he yelled:

_Exchange our fates!_

 

Beforehand, in his own blood like a proper devil contractor did he, Varian, writ addendum, dictating exactly what he meant. Lest the demon trick him and hurt daddy. Like in some old books. Ha, it paid to be smart! Maybe his brain didn't protect Dad before, but it sure did now.

Now father would be free, for just a small price.

_______________

_Now all I have to do is wait for the arrival of the dashing hero, Flynn Rider, on my eighteenth birthday, only four years from right now, wow!_

And when that day came and great Flynn arrived and swept him off his feet, he'd just only ask him for one tiny thing, maybe even tell him he can exchange that for marriage: not to throw Mom off the Tower to her death, just that detail!

Life was, right now, the best it's ever been. Varian has never felt more happy, and more loved. Oh, sure, Momma would often call him and his alchemy silly, stupid, horrible, worthless, and pointless.

That was good. No, that was wonderful, because every time, it brought to the forefront of his memory the image that was his secret, the one that, in his time, only he and Kyubey knew: the worthless boy almost killing his own Dad with alchemy. And so, for the next year, each time Mom said that, he'd surely have his father's face, in agony, etched in his mind.

It was good, because, because... then, for years from now, when great Flynn came, the stupid silly Moon boy would not be tempted to go and give the greatest King in all the land the worthless son who didn't deserve the love that his Daddy, the King, would certainly freely give him.

That was good. No, he wouldn't tell Flynn that he was the prince. No, Varian hadn't been a prince, and he wouldn't become the prince. No, he'd... maybe he could go and become a royal alchemist for a few years, without telling anybody about his secret identity? Then, he could earn Daddy's pride, and someday, someday, maybe confess to being the fortunately kidnapped son. Maybe ten years from now, or thirty.

He couldn't wait for that day, it seemed so... idyllic, as to be scientifically impossible, even. Maybe he'd even be able to propose to Cassandra on such a day? And why not.

Also, he promised Kyuubey to find some Witches and fight them. He felt bad about breaking that promise - he's fought exactly zero Witches so far - but how could he solve that conundrum? No Witch has ever made its labirynth in Mamma's Tower.

He sighed. He felt strangely empty for a moment, as if something was beginning to tug at him, like an invisible hand, pulling him, or attempting to weigh him down. He glanced at his beautiful Soul Gem, very black right now, with only a single blue dot. He knew it would be, as experience had shown, half-black and half-azure tomorrow morning. It had to do, according to his scientific experiments, with the time of the day.

As he's done here every evening since discovering it, he's read THE PAGE of the Diary. He might have noticed the sudden blue waterfall in his dark gem. But the truth was, he never did.

_______

As every evening for every day in the past few months, this Kyubei watched the aberrant Puer Magi fill himself with a galaxy of hope by reading three words on a scrap of some paper. Three words written by that Puer's hand, apparently, several years ago.

Kyubey understood it less and less with each passing day.


	2. Mother Knows Best/ For my Lord, Always (part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yes, this isn't part 2 of the first chapter. But it'll come. In other words, the chapters won't be exactly chronological. Think Star Wars or something. That's how I often roll (though not always, City with No Chiss for example (update coming this Saturday unless I'm ill, promise) will be mostly chrono).

He was woken up by a kiss on the forehead. He liked those kinds of waking the list, because these kinds meant that he had to use the rocks to do some youth encasing, again. That was the only thing he loathed, with all his heart, here in this Tower Prison Home life.

And yes, he was a prisoner, that was his secret because Mother Goethel thought he thought he was essentially free. But what she also had no idea about was that Varian was no innocent MoonRock baby. That he was also a failure of an alchemist and a failure of a Puer Magi and that he deserved this prison sentence, or some worse one.

"Good morning, baby."

"Good morning, m-mom."

"Yesterday," she continued, in a sweet voice that Varian's come to enjoy, the voice that was for him only, here, not for Rapunzel or anyone else, "you've said that you can free from the physical part of the encasement - and believe me, baby boy, the physical part is quite dross - much quicker now. Altough with your 'alchemy', and not with your powers, but well, the Mom can't complain. I've always known your brain was just..." she gestured with her fingers "that small."

Varian smiled weekly. "Mommy, that's the size of a snail, e-exactly."

Goethel chuckled.

"Oh, my dear, I've made a tiny mistake!"

What? Was she going to say... Huh, was the Soul Gem dependant on a mood? Just know, the stone that was half-black and half-blue... well, the dark part suddenly began to quickly get covered in azure dots, but that wasn't important. No, this feeling, this - oh, he was almost beginning to hope that well, maybe she could now say it was a size of a raccoon's, that would be very nice.

"It's actually this big."

Varian's face fell. What she showed now was ostensibly, well... He supposed that butteflies had bigger brains. But, that was just his own fault for his weird expectations. And besides, this was a joke. Yes, a joke. After all, between themselves, Cassy and Flynn often joked, just like that, and that was friendship. In other words, maybe Mom Goethel was beginning to like him! Yes, that would be great. He glanced at the Gem. Huh, he was feeling happy, wasn't he? And amused? At the joke? But the jewel was darkening quickly. And so - yeah, he had to scratch that theory. The jewel in no way reacted to Varian's emotion, just no way. Yeah, false hypothesis. So that was another false hypothesis! He was making progress!

But a very small one, so he wasn't feeling happy about that. And so, the fact that the jewel suddenly turned as blue as the sky on the sunny day was just another evidence that the hypothesis was false! Yes!! And the more theories he rejects, the quicker shall he discover the true reasons and makeups of his own soul, because he was preeeeetty sure that the Soul Gem was a soul, though the devil, uhm, the Kyubey, hasn't said that, explicity, ex catedra.

He looked at Mommy's face now, and laughed weekly. "Mhm."

Unseen by Mom, Kybuey sighed, Varian had no idea why. Out of the corner of his eye, Varian thought he saw some brilliant azure glow, more shiny than his own gem, no matter what experiments he conducted on his soul gem, and so, it couldn't be its glow. He just knew, scientifically, that it wasn't. 100 % sure.

"Yes, yes, laugh it up all you want, boy. But I'm feeling the encasing on my youth go away, now. So you're being pretty cruel, my son. Do you want to see your poor old mother wither and die?"

Varian shook his head frantically.

"No, no, no no no no no no!"

Goether sighed again, dramatically.

"I think you do. Why, you will probably one day encase my body and mind youth and then forget to free my body and mind, being the scatterbrained 'alchemist' you are.

Varian greeted his teeth, took a deep breath afterwards, or maybe five breaths and laughed, because this was just one of Mom's jokes, Mom always joked like that, these past seven months, always. She meant no harm, as she had no idea what he had done to Dad in another reality, so she meant, with this, no harm. Yes, she was only kidding. And so, not wishing to hurt her feelings, he laughed.

Thanks to mom, he's really become a pro at laughing when his heart was being squeezed. And laughing was nicer than crying, everybody knew that. And besides, joking only meant that Mom Goethel loved him. Or rather, his hair. And that was great. It reminded him that while he appreciated, truly, her neatly shallow love, it made him appreciate all the more... HIM.

He turned around to see his Kyubey suddenly beaming with happiness. Oh, that was very nice, too. He's made another person happy. Huh.. after a second or two, Kyubey didn't look so glad anymore. Of course... Varian's always been a failure at making people happy, wasn't he? Wait, Kyubey seemed content again, after a moment. And then not... ahhhhh, this was infuriating!!! 

Oh, now Kyubey seemed genuinely glad. Ohhhh, whatever, he no longer cared about the beast's feelings, even as it seemed happier and happier!

Mom tutted at him. 

"Now, now, what's with that face?"

"N-nothing, Mom!"

"Then, hop to it!"

Varian nodded and quickly ran towards his labs, at the bottom of the Tower... oooor he would have, if not for Goethel's hand on his shoulder.

"Why, do you want to subject your poor old loving Mother to those  _smells?"_

Varian's face fell again and he though he must have a stomach ache now, because he really felt something nasty creeping inside.

"Mom, don't worry! I know you're sensitive to that, so you know what?" He blabbered excitedly. "While I didn't change the formulas from the last time, I've added the molecules of daisys! Now all the chemicals smell of daisys and your nose won't suffer, I promise!"

He remembered no to jump up in excitement, because mom always hated when he did that.

"Daisys? Moon boy, son, I  _loathe_ daisys. Aaaabsolutely. They're a peasant flower. So mundane."

"O-oh. R-right. Y-yes. Of c-course! Uhm, just two hours, and I can change it to molecules of lilys!" 

Everybody loved lilies, didn't they? Even Cassy liked lilies, uhm, maybe. He no longer had any inkling as to what Cassy liked nowadays in this reality, apart from not him, because ha ha, of course she didn't like him, seeing as, you know, heh, she didn't know him. Here.  Heh. That was also a great joke. Great one. He'd laugh about it, but Mom hated it when he, as she put it 'talked and laughed at imaginary friends, like a dimwit', so he stopped himself. He didn't want to hurt Mom Goethe's feelings again, that would be the worst.

"Two hours?"

Mother Goethel sat heavily down on the sofa. 

"I knew it! At fifteen, of course. Teenage issues. My own son wants to kill me, ah, what a disapointment!"

Varian bit his lower lip to stop himself from realing outside that stopping sob that suddenly threatened to come out. Mom hated tears, unless she was the one crying, and he really didn't want to hurt her feelings, not again.

"Th-then, c-can it be lilys today, and roses next week, M-Mommy? Please?"

Goethel smiled weakly, apparently still suddened by his accidental murder attempt.

"From a dimwitted son, I suppose I can't expect anything better anymore. Now, sing. Hop to it!"

She... expected something better from him? For a moment, Mom honestly had some honest expectations? Truly? Uhh, something had to be wrong with his eyes, because for a moment, he thought he saw his Soul Gem shine ten times brighter, with bluish hue, than the Moon Rocks he commanded, at that was plainly alchemically impossible.

"Y-yes, yes. I'm singing, I'm singing."

Mother frowned and glanced at him with that patented patronised peek of pressuring of hers . "Baby, you're not  _singing._ What you've just done, sane people call  _talking._ And after you've done  _singing,_ hop quickly to those silly substances of yours, not crawl like you did last time, when I had to spent whole  _five minutes_ in amber because of such an unloving and ungrateful son of mine.

Ah, yes, last time. He remembered it well. Still had nightmares about it, though, being that he  _was_ an ungrateful and unloving son, truly, mom was right, in all the nightmares, the memory of Mom was substituted by the memory of Daddy. Each and every night. Each and every. Each and every--

"Son?"

Oh. He must have done it again. That thing. That thing that while his body was still firmly rooted here, in this reality, his mind must have wandered of to  ~~ _the Princess refused to help the Princess refused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't Irefused to help the Princess refused to help I promise the Princess refused to help it's not me I went through the blizzard didn't I didn't I_ another reality and I begged I begged on my knees father please believe me I begged and pleaded and I would have given anything anything anything and I made a contract with a kindly devil who is truly noble because he only wants to stop the Entropy and so do I, so do I, so I but the Princess refused to help ~~another reality.

The kidnapper was looking at him with a gentle concern. Not wanting to hurt her feelings, Varian smiled.

"Mhm! One rock singing, coming right up, Mom!"

"While I'm standing? Do you want me to  _stand_ inside the rock? Do you have any idea, silly child, how uncomfortable it is to stand inside it? It's torture!"

"T-torture?"

He paled. He had... all of his pointless treck to treacherous traitor princess in blizzard, all that time... it was the first time Mom used that 't' word, but this meant, all this time... his father had been there, standing, being encased in the rock... He was being tortured? He felt the pulling again. He thought he saw blackness before his eyes.

_________

Kyubey sighed. He should be happy, but right at this moment, he's noticed it - yes, this Puer could become a very powerful Warlock. Yes. But a few seconds ago, he's realised something.

If Varian became a Witch - right, Warlock, boys were still so rare in this profession - right now, he could produce a massive amount of energy. But that amount, he's now clearly realised, wasn't the limit of the boy's boundless soul. Unbelievably big soul, even though the stone seemed so small. No, he could still be pushed more, and he, Kyubey, won't let that 'witch', false witch, Goethel's, unconscious triggers, rob the universe of potential energy. So he ran and retrieve that stupid diary page and, pretending to be wind (to Goethel) propped it right before the boy's eyes. Even so... the process of turning into a Warlock has already began and if the Puer stopped now, it would mean that the amounts of his hopes were inhumane. Were they? Let's, in Varian's words, experiment. There was nothing to lose.

____

Goethel could suddenly, for the second time ever - the first was two weeks ago, she distinctly remembered it - feel some dark power in the stupid child, power that, surprisingly enough, had nothing to do with the Moon Song. No, it felt more like... a demon's? She shivered. She felt suddenly, with a great certainty, that something  _broke_ and that whatever will be released, will, in its first blow, desintegrate the whole Tower, with her inside, and she had no protection from it, not without Varian's song. And he wasn't looking as if he was going to sing ever again.

Suddenly, the wind brought a page, some silly diary paga that the boy would always read before falling asleep with a stupid  _eeeeeeeeeee, lanterns, eeeeeeee_ as if he was a mouse, really, and an even stupid grin, one of his hundred grins, but the only happy one in the baby's repertoir. However, whatever this meant, surely one stupid grin couldn't contain whatever disastrous power of utter doom and destruction has just been born inside the boy. She could already almost see his body desintegrate, while that strange stone of his turned as dark as crow's wings and- wait... something was happening.

"Eeeee!! Lanterns, he's searching, he's still searching!" somebody suddenly cried out with an insane glee. But it couldn't be the boy, not while this dark power was tearing him inside, it surely couldn't---

No. The dark power was gone, as if by a magician's touch. The boy's body suddenly put itself together, as impossibly as Santa existing. Her song boy was grinning.

The dark power evaporated. Just like that. She could see some burst vessels on the boy's body, but nothing lethal, and no trace of the power anymore.

He jumped up from happiness and lost consciousness. The stone fell to the floor. The stone, which was now the colour of the sky on the cloudless sunny day, with only one very black spot. If anybody now asked Goethel what happened here, she'd be at the loss for word. She, however, resolved never to use the word 'torture', 'stand', and 'rock' in the same sentence when speaking to her wild, strange alchemist protegee.

Fanning herself, she muttered, "Looked like a teenager's tantrum to me. Best to avoid those."

_________

He dreamt of his Daddy, in this reality, now the King of Corona, wow. Who, on Varian's every birthday. Sent lanterns, and so did everybody else. Telling Varian  _come home. I still want you to be here, no matter what you did to me. Come home, son. Come home. I know what you did to me in another reality, but you undid it here, in this one, and oh, I'm proud of you. This is what the lanterns mean, son. "I'm proud of you". That's their meaning._

In his sleep, Varian sighed happily, clutching the page with just a few words written on it, _glow + trajectory*castle= lanters!_. Kyubey stared, wide-eyed for the first time in his aeon long life.

_____

Yes, Varian's never felt more loved than in this Tower. Never. He began to doubt he should ever leave it, even with hero Flynn. Because... what for? As long as he was here, he was loved. HE always loved Varian, but now with the him HIM never met here, he surely also respected him. As long as he was here, HE - his father missed him and--

\- loved him, and was proud of him. As long as he couldn't see the crime in Varian's eyes. As long as Varian was in this Tower, Dad would always be proud of his Son. That was how it worked, that's what Varian proved to himself, scientifically, during last seven months.

He sighed happily again, cluthing the page fiercely to his chest, unaware that he's coughed up some blood in the meantime because of the recent excitement.

______

The now chipper alchemist woke up next morning, next to the mom who looked --- oh, no, her hair was  _grey,_ this was unprecedented, this was awful, he really had been a terrible son, he's almost murdered his own  ~~kidnapper she's the reason I can't get to go and hug Dad right now and tell him I'm now his new unlost royal alchemist prince son and tell him I'm sorry and listen to him forgive me~~ Mother!!

"M-mom, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, now wait just a minu-"

She shushed him.

"A minute? Ah, a minute. What a day, my own son is tor----ah, touristically inclined, I see. Only tourists wait around instead of doing things that  _matter_ right away."

"Toooooooourically? Mom, is that Arendellian accent? Wow, that's fascinating! Have you ever been to Arendelle? Do they have alchemists? Do they--"

"Ahem."

Mom said, and then ostentically brushed her own GREY hair a little.

"Oh. Oh. O-oh! Oh, hair. I mean, hell. I mean, heck. I mean--- " he knelt down before hair and clasped her free hand in both of his, desperately, took a deep breath, irritatingly interrupted by a cough- huh, was he slightly sick now, nah, and if he was, he'd just make himself some medicine, because he loathed the rocks so he'd never cure himself with rocks, _because it was all their fault, ok, okay Varian, stay here, stay here in this reality_ , so he took another deep breath, and, at a top of his lungs, very quickly sang, " _Rock, grow and shine, let you multiply, mirror of the Sun, entangle and encase, unchanging, preserve what's mine, never free what's mine."_

Naturally, he closed his eyes while doing so, and also let some of his freakishly long hair (especially for a boy, seriously, what would Dad think of his hairdo right now?) fall on his eyes as another barrier of protection as well. He had enough of seeing the silver and the amber at nights, no need to see this while lucid. When done with the song, he stood up, eyes still closed, thank you very much, and ran down to his lab chamber, only stumbling down the last five steps, not last twenty. Progress!! 

Mhm, no lilyscented antidotes yet, so unfortunately, Mom Goethel would have to suffer the daisys. He tried to pronounce the incantation needed to open one of the more dangerous (not in his hands) vials, but it was no use, he...mhm, judging by this feeling, he's done something to one of his vocal cords because of his too fast and maybe too loud and maybe, nevermind, singing.

Oh, well, medicine would take too long. Right now, he had to sing to himself. Yes, silent singing worked, as long as he formed the words and imagined the music.

He would have to encase himself to cure his throat. He'd have to - at last - learn what his father had felt while he had been pointlessly rushing to the Princess for help.

He...

"I suppose they will send lanterns flying in a week," he heard someone suddenly say. 

Oh, it was his friend, Kyubey!

" _Yes! It's my birthday next week, Dad will be searching for me, like each year, according to what 'I' writ in 'my' diary_!!" he mouthed excitedly to his friend and contractor, no wait, contractee, no, wait...

"Nevermind. Now I see."

" _See what?_ "

"Stupidity."

Varian grinned automatically and stopped himself from mouthing 'thank you'. 

Kyubey wasn't his mom, fortunately. There was no need to thank him for belittling him.

Alright, it was time to sing to himself and feel--

"Ahem."

" _Kyubey?"_

"Varian, you're thinking. Stop thinking. Sing. Remember, the false witch is waiting for you? Sing. No thinking."

Oh, right. Thinking bad, thinking bad. Alright, he could do it. Sing without a thought. Sure. Sure.

Rock, grow and... well, that was a tingly feeling, not too bad, okay, okay, and now that felt a bit like a fleabite, that was fine, and now it felt like something was beginning to grow on his neck, like some planty veins, ugh, so gross, too bad he was still conscious, of course he now closed his eyes but even under his closed... ugh, gross... even so, he was closer to it than with Goethel, so under his closed eyelids he could still see some amber shine ~~just like back then~~ and now-- 

"Varian!"

Hey, why was Kyubey interrupting his singing? And he really had enough of that tugging inside, that was really irritating.

So he  quickly wrote to Kyubey on a spare lab note, telling him not to interrupt his singing. Why would he interrupt it, anyway? Geez, some noble devils were weird, simply weird. He finished his song while ~~distracting himself with the~~ thought of the Kyubey's behaviour and then there was nothing.

He looked at the watch the next second or hour or let's see. Oh. Half an hour. Half an hour?! What was Rudiger thinking?! That's half an hour and some seconds in a sec that Mom will rightfully scold him for!

And then he shivered and quickly shut his eyes, trying his best to picture lanterns, just think of lantersn, and other nice things. Because Rudiger carelessly left a tiny bit of  _that_ on Varian's arm.

Breathing heavily, eyes shut all the way, the ran all the way up to mommy, bumping so hard into her that he broke his arm, but that was good enough. Very distracting. So, good enough.

And now, eyes still closed, he used the improved over months powers of science!! To get her out. He still had no idea how to do it with his Moon Rock powers, he was still a disappointment in that field.

It was difficult to use all the proper substances and also, well, to put the sudden fire off his sleeve once or twice, with eyes shut, but look at the bright side! It was twenty times less hard than it would be with his eyes open!

And so, voila. Thirty more seconds and Goethel was free, frowning with a hearty disappointment at his lackluster speed.

Today was great, wasn't it? He tried to grin, but he'd have to  _think_ in order to put on his gladdest scientifically achieved fake smile, and thinking, right now, inexplicably was coupled with some darkening and  _tugging_ and so, he, he sobbed instead.

Unexpectadly, the now young and content Mother put her arms around her, and pulled him into a tight embrace, a warm one. And, shockingly, praised him.

"Shush, child. You're not a complete disappointment, son. Truly, you could have been worse."

Could have been. If she only knew how much worse he had been, in another reality!

"Shsh. You're thinking something silly, are you not? No thinking, baby."

He sighed, and burrowed into her embrace. Yes, no thinking. No thinking was great. The tugging subsided. And, completely unconnectedly, he thought he saw two single dark blue dots on his soul. So, good enough.

Good enough.

______

That night, while the Moon shone gently at the boy, and for once, judging by the boy's happy sighs and murmurs of 'dad', succeeded in giving its boy happy dreams, Kyubey realised that the word 'lanterns' was just a codeword.

And that the Alchemist Puer Magi, not in his mind, but in his soul, knew how not to turn into a Warlock and would never, ever, turn into a Warlock. He'd always be pushed to the very brink of the despair, by himself or by Goethel, then almost become a Warlock, and then just... not. Because with one word, he could, unlike the Magis which needed more words or pictures to think of all the hopeful memories, change the almost-Grief Seed back into a very potent Soul Gem, more and more powerful, with more and more karma.

And now Kyubey realised: there was no point in watching over Varian. Varian will never fall into despair - oh, he will fall, but he will always just saw the poisoned pieces of himself off with the saw of those three words, metaphorically speaking, and become just a powerful Magical Boy who'd never transformed for the first time to this day - again. Infuriatingly.

And so, watching over Varian was pointless in Varian's company. No. Someday, Varian would reach his limit and still not transform. On that day, Kyubey would need to come here:

To come to the Tower with the only person in all the realities that held enough power over Varian's Soul Gem, yes, indeed, much more than Varian himself, to unknowingly facilitiate Varian's transformation into a Warlock.

Mhm, exactly. On that day, Kyubey would come here with king Quirin of Corona. And he had to make sure that the king stayed alive and healthy till that day, and so, now he headed to the palace.

On the way, he still wished he remembered contracting this strange, strange undespairable alchemist.

______  
Two weeks ago.

That same powerful dark power that put any powers Goethel's seen to shame, she's almost put it out of her memory, but she remembered now. It was something that Varian's magical half-visible to her 'friend' whose purpose she still hasn't discovered hasn't witnessed as he was elsewhere that day, outside the Tower.

Varian messed up a bit and one of her hands had been encased in silvery and amber Moon Rock for seven hours. He seemed to be on a verge of psychological breakdown, and, how would he sing then.

So she put her free hand on his shoulder and gently whispered, even changing completely the tone of her voice to sound much younger, like some very kind older sister or young mother, "Varian, listen. Listen. Varian. Everything will be okay, Varian. Son. I promise, son. Everything will be okay, I promise. My little Varian, I promise."

The burst of the sudden dark energy... and she saw, back then, Varian's body desintegrate and reform, Varian's weird magic stone completely darken and change shape, Varian's body reform, but this time, cold and lifeless, right before her very eyes, and then, she wasn't sure why, she probably couldn't think of any other counteraction, but she, in a panic mode, tried thinking back on all the things the stupid boy seemed to love, and she yelled, "Ham sandwiches!!"

The half-formed montrosity disappeared, Varian opened his eyes, the stone was suddenly so blue that it hurt her eyes, and Varian looked at her, serenely, but with an unseeing gaze, and she, his 'mother', had no idea whom he was truly looking at, but she didn't want the monster to come out of Varian's body again and desintegrate her with a single blast, so, if, right now, Varian wanted her to be someone else?

So, very well, she would be that person.

"Varian," she whispered.

"Dad..." he muttered, "dad, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. It wasn't Rapunzel's fault, I only lied to myself it was. It was mine. And now, I'm going to change into a Warlock - I think - I think I knew it, deep down, when Kyubey informed me about the Witches and Warlocks, because alchemically speaking, that only makes sense, Daddy, you know? So... please, run. From here. Or I'll kill you again, Dad. Please, run."

Dad? Was it possible for that child to have memories from back when he was a newborn baby? Was that the Moon's powers, Goethel wondered.

"I won't leave you, son," she replied, trying to sound like a man.

"O-okay. Then--then all I have to do is... make my Soul Gem fully blue, right, Daddy? Maybe... say some jokes... no, jokes are bad, always. They darken and pull."

"Pull?"

"To Warlockhood, Daddy. I wouldn't expect you to... understand... though no, if my alchemical theory is right and the pull is just the chemically magical reaction of despair, then you do understand, Daddy, because you had it, when... when Mom, not Goethel Mom but Mom Mom, died..."

And then, he was, fortunately, unconscious again, breathing heavily, and Goethel no longer had to pretend to be somehow miraculously remembered King of Corona.

Yes, that day two weeks ago had been the hardest day for her. So, why then, had she forgotten it?

Ah. Yes. And so did he. He's done it. Not his Kyubey-given powers, whatever they were, but his Moon powers. He encased that memory, not wanting it to ever be broken. And by encasing it, naturally, he hid it. He would never forget it because he'd never remember it - an eternal precious memory.

Now she understood. Even the memory of her remembering his memory, and her memory of him remembering, that, too, had been encased, preserved, until today. And that is why she only remembered the first time he almost became some kind of a dark maze today.

Now everything made sense. He still couldn't remember that day, because he'd never forget it. Because in his memory, unseeing, only pictures in his mind, and only sounds half-real... In his memory, false as it was, it wasn't her and ham sandwiches, but his father, the King Quirin, coming to the Tower, specially for him and, apparently, ham sandwiches.

Now it made sense to her. Apart from ham sandwiches, that is. She still couldn't understand either ham sandwiches or the lanters.

She'd never understand them. Not in a relation to the boy who hasn't eaten a single ham sandwiches ever since seven months ago, even though they had been his favourite before that day when he suddenly seemed to have slightly different magical aura, as if he had been his own twin or something alike.

No, nothing made sense, actually, to Mother Goethel at this very second. Yes, indeed, even the fact that her dear Rock became very strange ever since so suddenly, seven months ago, completely stopping with the stutter and hiccups. The stutter evaporated. It was beginning to come back, now, but much to slowly for this to feel natural.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Yes, our alchemy moon baby (and that's a part of his Wish, not his original nature) will, even with crystal clear Soul Gem, upon hearing the word 'promise', or a few other choice words ;), have it immediately darkened to the point of grief seeding in two minutes. He is... a very weird magical boy, because his despair-hope pendulum differs from despair-grief... I call them pocket watches... of Madoka girls. :)


	3. Interlude 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He is amazing. Even more so than Mom. There's no one in this world or the one he's been spirited away from than the one and only Quirin. There's no one stronger, faster, wiser, warmer... he's not even tempted to run any physics tests on it.
> 
> He's just that certain. It's not love, because there's no hair invoved, he thinks. It's a onesided... hmmm... amazingship, y-y-y-yes, e-exactly!
> 
> And that's more than that small thing called love that Varian has for Mommy Goethel and she for his h-hair; yes, he tries to be observant, he wants to rival Einstein after all! Yes, he is a moron, he knows from Mom, but maybe even an idiot can rival Einstein if he ttries h-hard enough??

H-h-h-he's jealousEversincethediscovery, heknowsthat hhhhhhhhhh-hhhhhhhh-hhhhe's V-V-V-Varian not  _Varian_ and so, the only place he has in Quirin's heart is as a substitute. He's read in some old book once - on a desert, one would see sand as water and try to drink it.

A-a-and very well, then. Someday  _Varian_ , the real son, and he could see all the reality in mister Qurin's eyes, would return, and then Quirin would be happy and Varian would go away, no matter what pretty and lifesaving wonderful l-l-l-l-ies Qurin would feed him. For mister Quirin's sake. Because otherwise, Varian feares he'd be tempted to arrange some physically plausible casual lethal accidents. Because apparently  _Varian_ was clumsy, so an a-a-a-cc--

"Varian? What's wrong, son?"

Ohnononononohashesomehowrrreadhhisththth--

"Are you feeling ill? You've been awake for three hours. "

And still in bed, eyes tightly shut, so how..?! Ah... fatherhood had to be some branch of magic.

Varian shivered, jumped up, and quickly mouthed  _I am fine, Quirin, sir._

Quirin only shook his head. How was it that he had perceptivenesa of x rays? With each passing day, he awed the insignificant Moonboy more and more. Mother was wrong: perfection existed outside the tower and its name wwas Q-Q-Q-Quirin.

Scientifically provable.

Yes, Varian even let the now young man  ~~murder Mom probably or she was already so old w-w-wh-wh-wh-whathashedonehewwasthew-w-w-w-worsthe wwwwwasun-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-r-r--r-t-t-t-t-f-f-f-f-uuuullll m-m-m-m~~ cut Varian's hair just because Quirin (he looked twenty now, which Varian could see that he, unlike Mom, didn't like, but he couldn't age him up, not without hurting him! Or, to be h-o-o-oonnnn-n-n-nest, hurting his own h-h-happiness a-a-a-a-a-a-c-c-tually. Becausehewouldthenhavetoencasethememoriesofthemtogetherifhewastoreverseencapsulateinordertogrowhimolderinsteadofyounger.

Because the effects won't disappear for the few years, Varian knew, so maybe even Mom would live for a few years, whew) wanted to cut Varian's hair.

Oh, he hasn't asked why Quirin wanted to cut his hair, why should he? Quirin was, Varian's observed, with physical evidence - that's in the science of Physics, for ignorant commoners - good. And since he was good, all he was doing was surely as perfectly good and perfect as Q-Q-Quirin was. Varian would do literally anything Quirin would ask for him, as long as it was physically doable.

And he slept soundly in Quirin's house, despite knowing from Mommy that sleeping outside the Tower meant that scary men w-w-would k-k-kill y-y-you innyoursleepbutifQuirin d-decided t-to k-kill h-him, th-that w-would b-b-be g-g-g-great, t-t-too, becauseifQuirindiditthenthatmeantthatwould b-be a g-goodeedandVarianwouldbehappyforhim. W-well a-and s-slightly d-dead b-but th-the w-world w-would b-be a b-better p-p-placeforitifQuirinso decided.

With those thoughts, Varian grinned, he's learnt perfectly well how to grin in the Tower because Mom loved c-c-content little boys, and now fell a-a-asleep f-f-f-for r-r-r-real.

AaandbesidesQuirin'sperfectperfectnessaroundcalmedVarianslightlyandsothemomenthetoldhimtogoawayVarianwouldgoaway- a-a-a-away t-to d-d-death, h-h-h-h-he d-d-decided. Or maybe Varian would just encase himself, also physically, forever, that would p-probably f-feel v-very n-nice in s-s-ssuch a case. Because after learning amazingship (not love, love was small), one couldn't live w-w-without i-it again f-for c-certain. Science! With that soothing thought, he fell asleep completely.


	4. Interlude 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But that page struck the real alchemist and true son, the not real prince, the not real rockchild, with neither pity, nor hope, nor despair, but pure unaltered horror.
> 
> So for the first time ever, he transformed, wanting to chase the sad - no, the terrifying - creature down, because if he was HERE then the creauture had to be THERE in his place, and HE was in mortal danger!!

Varian appreciated Varian1's diary. What, he had to call him something else in his mind, in order to differentiate. They were both sons of Quirins, they were both scientists - although why did Varian1 choose, here in this perfectly alchemical Tower, Physics instead, b-boggled the mind, really - so he had to  constantly remind himself that they were weird crossworlds-twins, not the same person.

Or were they?

N-no.

Still. He loved reading that boy's Tower Diary. The poor, poor boy, who thought, when he was six years old, that he could someday earn Mother Goethel's pride and respect.

Still, the boy was no moron, as his diary entries evidenced. And that gave this Varian hope, too. That boy stopped believing such fairytales as Goethel's love at the young age of 9, so, not all hope had been lost.

And it's thanks to the little dear Physicist twin that Varian was reminded of lanterns. Their significance was lost on his poor little 'brother', but not on Varian. They were the light in the darkness.

He liked to imagine that Varian1 was now with Daddy. The Daddy. Of course, with the better controlled - more real, not just Wished - power of the Moon, he liked to imagine that the Physicist instantly freed Father. Of course, probably also made him younger out of 'good' intentions beaten into 'brother's' poor broken mind by Mommy.

He liked to imagine the frown at Dad's face at that, and Varian1 sheepishly aging Father back to Dad's proper age. Because Dad never liked magic, no, he avoided it like fire.

He liked to imagine Varian1's soul healing in Dad's firm embrace, and the boy's speech impediments that even sometimes seeped into the diary pages instantly healing, too. If anyone could heal someone's broken mind, Dad could. He grinned at the thought.

He liked to imagine - but also hated to imagine - his 'brother' really becoming his brother as father adopted him.

The thought would simetimes bring him qual amounts of pain, envy, and hope.

_____

However, everything changed when one day, he found, in a rubbish dump that hasn't been dumped, a page. Oh, at first, he was really glad at finding it. It had really great and well-crafted equations, it was hard to believe it was written by a 10-year old! Oh, he knew it was a ten year old. After all, Varian's read the whole diary and learned the progression - or rather, declind - of 'brother's' handwriting by heart. The equations were perfect, so perfect that for a moment the Alchemist stopped grinning but sobbed a little out of the sheer pride at his little's brother's intelligence.

And then he thought his heart froze for a moment when he understood the meaning behind the calculations. There were two. Both about the fall. One was for a grown woman, one for a boy of surely ten, though a bit malnourished... still...

For the first time ever, after two years and ten days of never doing so and being a Magical Boy only in theory and in Gem, Varian took his Soul Gem, made the gesture, and transformed. He had a Father in a different reality to rescue from a sick little broken (by Mom, remember) creauture.

Hm, the trasformation meant a lot of tugging was occuring, he's found. But also no more stuttering. 

No more stuttering. And the future Flynnigan Rider on a white horse could go and fuck himself with a shovel. This Varian, today, was leaving the stupid damned Tower on his own, consequences and Goether and Flynn's life be damned. And he knew now, with the perfectly lucid clarity above any doubt, why his 'brother's' chosen field in science was Physics, not Alchemy. Yes, for his nefarious purposes, his sick perverted little murderous brother chose well, he thought grimly. Fuck Witches and Warlocks and Incubators. He had a human to chase, now.

_Daddy. Daddy, you've probably, in that world I've come from, adopted the other Varian for your son, out of the misguided pity, like I him for my little brother. But Father - the two of us have never noticed the truth: that he's a caged wild animal. Stay away from him. Stay away from him, or he will bite!! Don't love him, don't cuddle him, it's a dangerous creauture and you probably think it's a domesticated broken kitten, stay away, I'm coming to deal with this vermin, so stay away, don't feed the creauture, it will only bite in the end, don't let his brokennes deceive you, stay away, you don't know that animal for what it is!! I'm coming to save the day and kill the beast!! And if you hate me when I kill it, because you think this mad thing can be mended, that's fine, I've only just learned this thing is beyond repair, you have no idea, because you haven't read the thing's calculations, and it probably just looks like a wounded rabbit to you. No, it's not, it's a wounded cobra, so stay away and don't worry, I'll kill it quickly. I'll cross realities, somehow, I'm a Magical Boy now._

_That 'I' is a horrid being, and so... touch father's single hair and pay dearly, 'I'._

No more stuttering.


	5. Grey Days No Longer Exist? (part 2 out of 5)

_Singing Amen, I'm alive (I'm alive)_

-***-

"I-I-I-I", Varian bolted from the bed and began talking enthusiastically, "I-I-I a-a-a-a-a-a-m-m-m-m i-in-nnn y-y-y-y-y-y-ourhousenodreaming?? S-s-s-s-s-s-sir???!"

The strangest thing was, sir Quirin must have not heard his pathetic stutter, because unlike Mommy, he hasn't put his hand on Varian's mouth, hasn't frowned or groaned even, haven't made that  _yes I love this child but I'll never like this child_ expression. Strange, that.

O-oh n-n-no, d-did sir Quirin have hearing impairment before of that someone's utterly botched encament? Who was that moron, anyway?! He should be punished.

"I-I-I," Varian began repeating, in case sir Quirin's heard nothing, but then sir Quirin looked at him with... with what? It wasn't impatience, it wasn't dislike, it wasn't love, because he wasn't looking at the hair... Varian couldn't really name that emotion, so it stumped him and he stopped speaking. After a moment - as if giving him a chance to speak again? Whatever for? Quirin replied.

"Varian," he said, wearily, "tonight, I thought... you could sleep, rest a bit, because you're exhausted. Instead, you wrote down your whole life. I mean, replicated your diary."

"O-o-oh, nnoonoononootherewasnowritingijustwelliencaseditinmymindsoherenowifreeditonthesepagesthatsall", Varian let out without stopping to breathe, since breathing meant pauses.

"I... don't claim it to understand the mechanics of it, son. That's  _not_ what matters here," Quirin continued, now standing up and coming closer.

Varian paled. Quirin looked guilty - and Varian could r-r-recognise that one, because, well, Mom n-n-never, but V-Varian himself often looked in the mirror.

"Listen, I don't mean to intimidate you. And I understand now who you are. And so, if you'd rather not be called 'son' by the stranger you've never met, tell me."

In reply, Varian fell completely silent and waited for the strange man to continue. The stranger then put his hand on Varian's shoulder - what did it mean? Mother's never done such strange gestures.

"Varian. It's hard to believe that there are different... world? Realities? Versions of events? But you're a living proof of it, and so, I believe you now."

Oh. Oh, he did believe! Well then, that made everything easier! Awkwardly taking the man's hand off his own shoulder, Varian stood up from the bad, took his diary and went for the door. And then through the door. Maybe he should say 'goodbye', but he's never been very good at farewells. With Mom, that was f-f-f-f-fine, because she always came back, anyway.

"Wait!" Quirin called after him. "Varian!"

Huuuuuuhhhh???!

"Aren't you hungry?"

He had to admit, well, to himself at least, that he was. H-h-however, he had no reason to trouble the kind stranger with it just because he h-h-happened t-to b-be hi-i-i-sssss ssssso-on-n doppelganger. And so, he shook his head. And then, his stomach betrayed him and grumbled.

"Please, son, just stay for the dinner."

Varian nodded mutely. No words, as he had no wish to waste anymore of this man's precious time than absolutely necessary.

_________

The dinner wasn't as good as some that Mom made, but somehow, it was warmer, he thought. Not physically speaking, it was... something more. Something deeper. Afterwards, he took a deep breath, imagined that he was talking about Physics inventions in order to stop his stutter -and said, trying to put everything he felt into just these two words:

"Thank you."

Sir Quirin smiled, or at least it was something similar to a smile, surely, though so unlike Mommy's smiles that have all been studied carefully that the young Physicist couldn't be quite certain.

"I'm glad you liked it."

Truth be told, Varian didn't like it. The tastes, the structure. He didn't like it at all. But there had to be some well-hidden ingredient that made this - this -th-this all not only edible, but a-a-a-ddictive, if he was to be honest. Something deep, deep inside of it, something that he c-c-c-could n-n-not see a-a-at a-all. Strange. He had to do some research on this matter later on.

Ah, but there was no later. He should leave now and no longer bother sir Quirin. He took a page from one of his pockets, and using, not having a pen at hand, he quickly sang under his breath, imprisoning the air - first to the silver state, then to liquid amber - and then took the amber, and, using it, wrote:

_Sir. I can age you up back sir it's just sir that to do it I well need time and to do it carefully because we will have to well not erase but sort of hide also so well you won't access them your memories sir of i mean today and yesterday sir am i making sense_

and quickly dropped the sheet of paper at Quirin's feet, dreading the answer. He really should've been writing more slowly and using punctuation. After all, Mother Gothel would always tell him that if his head was as empty of punctuation as some of his pages, then no wonder his brain was so small.

Sir Quirin nodded. "Then let's put it off for now. There are more important matters, Varian, after all I've read about your life. And there are more upsetting matters as well, but... that's not something I can save you from quickly."

"S-s-save?"

What? Since when did he need saving?

"But I can at least - and I'm not doing this because in another world your father is someone who looks just like me, do you understand? - one thing can be solved quickly. So that you never suffer from it again."

Varian listened carefully, still mightily confused. Of course this wasn't because his father - wait, he had a father?! - looked like sir Quirin. Because of course this had to be, these strange feelings and actions of sir Quirin, they had to exist solely because he, unfortunately pathetic boy, looked and sounded just like some other boy. Some great boy. Not loved, but something more. A boy who truly existed, who had some alchemy, who had a caring- no, caring was a small word - father, a boy who... who was even worth getting shoddily encased for. But how long would these feelings, reliant only on the similarity of the surface, linger in sir Quirin? It-t-tt couldn't be long, because, 

~~_because I must be a very different son from Varian. because I can't imagine mother ever jumping in front of me while some unknown to us spikes attack. He must be really amazing, that Varian. The only bad thing he has is having pathetic appearance and voice- but if I was him, I could live with that, and be unimaginably happy, still._ ~~

And then sir Quirin suddenly took a knife and while Varian paled, shiver, and shrieked for help to the high skies, and began singing in self-defence, cut Varian's hair off.

After a moment, the Tower boy let himself open his eyes. When did he even close it? Sir Quirin was halfway - lower half - encased in the silver moonrock, not amber. Not hurt, just unable to move. To move ever, probably, seeing as the hair had now been c-c-cut, and so, the rocks would never move again. ~~And neither would Mom. That was a good thing- no, that was a bad thing, that page was in the rubbish dump for a r-r-r-reason-n-n!!!~~  Ah, yea, because self-defence on Varian's part, but what was up with taking a knife... o-oh! Oh! He...h-h-hair!!!???!!

For reasons that Varian couldn't understand at all, because what could they even be?!!! S-sir Q-Quirin c-cut Varian's hair off, leaving it short!!

But that.... but that....M-m-m-mom would d-d-d-d-d-die!!!!

Taking a deep breath, Varian imagined that his next outburst, right now, would be about physics, and screamt:

"Murderer! Gothel won't love me without this, won't care for me, and she,she,she, she will die, she will die, she will die, and if she does, I'm killing myself!! Murderer!!!"

With that, he ran out the door, not looking back. The hair... the hair was all Varian was, all he was, because all the other parts of him were pathetic!!

______

He came back three days later. Not because he wanted to. I-i-it was just that he knew, from the books, that a bit more time and sir Quirin would surely die of thirst. And so, he fed him.

Yeah, it was... weird. Because sir Quirin hardly had any strength left, so Varian had to do everything. Like a reversal of how it was with Varian and Mom once upon a time, long ago, wh-wh-when after every hair u-u-use... when every u-u-use of h-h-hair exhausted V-V-Varian to the p-point where M-m-mommy had to do stuff for him, j-j-just so he wouldn't die.

_why cut hair_

Varian wrote these words an hour later and handed the sheet of paper to sir Quirin.

"To save you from that witch," sir Quirin replied, in barely a whisper, apparently still exhuasted. Well, yes, certainly.

Not eating and not drinking and not moving lower body half for three days certainly had that effect on any homo sapiens.

But if... Varian sat down on the floor, breathing heavily, almost panicking now. But if this was done for him... but he no longer had hair... but, but, b-but! For you... always meant for your hair, when Mom would say it. Varian was a moron, but he was a s-s-smart moron, so this much, he knew. But, not with Quirin! I-if the hair was cut, th-then not for h-h-hair, but... for other parts of V-Varian?! That made no sense at all!!

He came closer to sir Quirin, close enough to condescendingly pat the strange man on the head.

"Y-you, s-s-sir, a-a-are an u-u-t-t-t-t-t-errrr, m-m-moron. A-all m-m-my o-o-other p-p=p-parts are w-worth l-l-less than y-y-yesteryear's s-s-s-snow."

This had to be the first time ever that Varian's met somebody stupider than himself, and that had to be a real a-a-a-ccomplishment.

"No, son, all your 'other parts' are worth much more. Your father - the one in your world - will explain it to your more quickly, as I don't really understand the things that happened to your mind when you were lost... but he must, because when you were taken, he was lost."

"L-l-l-lost? that'showonetalksofthingsofvaluenotoftrash!"

Sir Quirin sighed.

"You're not trash."

Oh. This.... maybe he could believe this? It sounded more believable, at least, than 'you're valuable, though not by a very far margin. But maybe V-Varian could suspend his d-d-disbelief for a moment.

 _If I'm not trash,_ he wrote quickly and carefully,  _then I'll get your legs out of those rocks. Through the power of physics!! I'm just Varian, not your precious son Varian, but, but, but. Will you trust me? Will you trust me?_

After what just happened, surely the man, the stranger, wouldn't trust him. However... what? He... nodded weakly, wearily, but still, he nodded... whyever for?? Was he insane?

Still, somehow, the sky outside seemed to brighten.

"Then... I need to built my Physics labs first!!"

Of course he didn't stutter and fail and hesitate, in this field of science, he never did.

"D-do you think your son," he asked, sheepishly, looking down at some bread crumbs on the floor, "d-d-d-do you think your son Varian will forgive me if I built him in his Alchemy lab, sir???"

Oh. But. Sir Quirin was already asleep. Of course, after all that exhaustion. Varian checked his pulse. For everything the man went through, it was quite alright.

Okay. Permissions later. For now, he had work to do! Maybe Mom wouldn't die in the meantime, he thought with equal hopes and disappointment.

And then, a gleam caught the insecure physicist's eye. On the floor, next to the tangled mess of cut brown her, there lay... a knife? No, these pieces could no longer be called a knife. Naturally, the kind sir had spent a lot of time trying (and f-f-failing) to ff-f--free himself for the silver, but currently black (too b-black) moon rock encasing the better V-v-varian's father up to the waist.

Varian chuckled nervously. So, the man believed V-Varian left him for dead, didn't he? And d-d--d-desperately tried to break his black prison in order to survive.

The boy, pale and shivering, not daring to look into Quirin's eyes looked at the man's right hand and yelled, wanting to wake the man instantly to already get it over with, already have the 'no', the r-rejection, the c-contempt, the ridicule of the very pathetic idea.

"Q-Q-Quirin, ssss-s.."

No, not like that, he had to... no pauses, but, ah, yes, song, song!

So he singsonged tearfully, with trepidation:

"My sir, I'm _no son of yours, only_ a pathetic moron and a brat,  _but if you could find it in your heart, to please in next aeons of time forgive me?"_

Now awake, Quirin looked at him solemnly and replied,

"My son, I've forgiven you three days ago."

Varian stumbled backwards, almost drunkenly. Yes, mommy had let him drink once, and this was the same feeling.

The logical, scientific part of his mind, was going into overdrive with seeking the hardest, most complicated, solution, explanation, to the strangest occuring phenomenon.

Strong? Check. Inhumanely beautiful and radiant? Double check.

Inhumanely brave. Inhumanely wise. Inhumanely supportive. Ihumanely forgiving.

So Varian quickly prostrated himself, as was only right, since he was pretty sure he's just found out what sort of being he met, must have been fated to meet, in this tiny pathetic house. He know was pretty sure sure what Quirin was.

Now he regretted not knowing the words to pray to the lord Quirin with.

W-w-was he a-allowed to ask????

However, his newfound god's stomach grumbling very loudly broke Varian out of his sacred reverie and made him tumble around, laughing the loudest giggle he's ever laughed, singsonging,

_Hungry, I can't believe you're hungry, Towers, is of this for real or am going slightly mad, I just know you're hungry._

And then Varian, since before he could ever remember, laughed enough to make the good use of his lungs. 

Genuinely.

Outside the window, the day was so cloudy, wonder how it was, the physicist thought, that the Sunlight seemed to have brightened immeasurably, almost hurting his eyes.

It felt.........n-nice? Unforgivably nice, and he... chose to bask in it, just for that split second, despite Mom's refusal to allow it.

Yes. Quirin was, was, w-was, was Quirin. That much was irrefutable, Varian's just learnt. The greatest discovery of modern science.

Varian giggled. And then it hit him, the sudden realisation of the possibility. "U-uhm, s-sir, I-i kn-n-now...." Encasement and all. However... one impotant question remained... because Varian knew his own powers, and knew a bit about homo sapiens biology... "C-c--c-c-can y-y-y-y---------- feelyourlegsatall?????????"

Ooh, that was too big of an emotion, mommy was right, so Varian's certainly as she said too small, uh, brain rebelled after emotionally assaulting itself and passed out for two minutes.

While passing out, he must've imagined sir Quirin crying his name out, with honest concern.

Huh. His imagination was going wild, now, wasn't it? Concern? 

"Concern? For a hairless boy?" Mother would certainly taunt and Mother knew---

"Varian!"

No.

V-Varian opened his eyes. Today, he... felt like opening them. If only to see sir Quirin.

He opened his eyes, with a clear goal.

"P-p--p-p-p-r-r-r-rrrrrresent!!!", he shouted out in reply, looking into the man's beautiful eyes for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: The truly moon!Varian doesn't comprehent it yet, but yes, it happened: the halfimprisoned and starving Quirin's adopted him and now considers himself to have two clumsy sons named Varian, plus one grudge against a dead witch, c'est la vie.
> 
> Also, I really want to upload "Famous Roguess Eugennia Flynn (part 1)" next, but I need to correct some mistakes from reworking some timelines first, before I do, so, next month.


	6. Interlude 7 (If Ever They Met--)

It is a dream. Mitsunari knows it, because he can't feel Lord Hideyoshi here. And the only place he, now Lord Hideyoshi's Puer Magi, cannot sense his Master, is in a dream.

There's a boy, on the other side of the Dream. He's scratching desperately at some yellow rock, shouting "Dad" with the emotion, no, with the meaning, that Mitsunari Ishida recognises.

 

( _Hideyoshi-sama!!!_ )

 

Good. Most people were so inhuman, so cattle-like if their lack of even basic despair and devotion, it was refreshing to see another true  _person._

_There is someone in that amber, now I see. Frozen, but he doesn't seem dead. And he's the little boy's Everything._

Mitsunari throws the boy a sword. And because this is a Dream, the Shadow's dream, Mitsunari's dream, the sword that's a gift from Hideyoshi-sama can cut through everything.

 

And so, the boy cuts through the rock very carefully, and his Everything is free, though for now unconscious.

"Thank you", the boy whispers. "I'll repay you when we wake. I promise. And unlike Her, when  _I_ promise... don't you dare think I won't keep it. What do you want?"

Mitsunari answers without thinking, now suddenly realising there was a reason who lent the boy his sword.

"Universes. **~~Universes with no days when the rain poured down and I stood there, seeing Ieyasu stand over His dead body.~~** With my powers, Lord Hideyoshi has been saved in one. But there are still times and places where he hasn't been. And so, it's not enough. You do understand."

The boy nods.

"I do understand, uhm, what was your name again? Mister Ishida."

Mitsunari doesn't question the fact that the boy knows his name. Because he already knows that the boy's name is Varian, and Mitsunari doesn't care how or why  _he_ himself knows that much.

"You're not a Puer Magi or the one from Moon's Shadow, Varian. Not this you. So, why this you?"

"Because I'm not them, I only have alchemy, mr Ishida. And so, I've perfected my alchemy far more than they have."

Mitsunari frowns. Alchemy? Is that truly that useful? He supposes he'll see, later.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Next up, "Dust in My Hair" (part 2) and "On the Day it Rained/What's Alchemy?" (part 5), because I miss me some Puer Magi Mitsunari Ishida and the original kidnapped Moonboy Prince, aka other!Varian deep (or not) introspective. :D And then, in February if I have time, "Quirin's Clumsy Daughter and all the Chameleons" (part 2). Wait for it! Or something.
> 
> After, "If it's the Last Thing I Do" (part 3/Last).(Homura's and Cassandra's) :)
> 
> Or I might change the order if I edit/write some other chapters better before that. Seriously, after the fic, I'm showing my mapping out of the stuff, because this is the first time in my life I've done that with fics. XD


End file.
